Well, as usual, I have let time fly by since I last blogged. This is not by choice, however, because if I could make time slow down I sure would. Springtime in Florida is really beautiful. I can't appreciate it like I would at home, though. We had no insufferable winter to make us appreciate when the warmth finally came and the lawn finally turned green. It was like that when we got here, so it's just not as exciting.
I am blogging outside in a bikini trying to bring the bit of tan I had a few weeks ago back to life. It is amazing how hard it is for me to get any color whatsoever and even harder to keep it. Chris, however, got one sunburn and is now magically a natural Floridian.
Chris is enjoying himself quite a bit. He is gone today, unfortunately, doing two flights with an instructor. He is already in the aerobatics portion of flight school. He is figuratively and literally flying through flight school. We thought he would have a break a couple of weeks back, but instead they started him right off at the beginning of that next week and since then he has barely had time to sit down. He found out pretty late last night that someone else had taken leave so he would be flying instead. He has just a few portions left of flight school and as crazy as it sounds, we could move again before the end of the summer.
Moving. Ah, yes. As if the sight of moving trucks didn't give me enough anxiety already, now I have to think about another one coming to invade my life in just a few months. I knew I was in for a ride when I married Chris, but I don't think even he knew how much we would be moving around. Of course, I could be getting completely ahead of myself by saying that we could move in a few months. There is a big chance that Chris could get selected to fly Ospreys or helicopters, which would mean that we would stay in Florida for at least another three months. Regardless of what he selects for, we won't be here much longer than the beginning of 2015. Chris would really like to fly jets of C-130s, and although I am biased, I think he would do very well with either of those. Anyone that has even flown with Chris knows that he has such a calm demeanor when it comes to flying and honestly, I have never seen someone look so natural in a cockpit.
It is a gorgeous day out. Hardly a cloud in the sky, 70s, birds singing, dogs sprawled in the backyard. A gorgeous day but for one reason, not so much. According to the locals, these bugs are called, "lovebugs", but all I know is that they are fornicating directly in my line of sight and being very distracting. I can also tell that they want me to watch, which makes them perverts.
It has really been some kind of year as far as weather goes. Moving down here, we did not expect any kind of snow or ice, but we managed to have an ice storm that closed down the area for three days. Snap forward a few months ahead and a couple of weeks back, our area received 27 inches of rain in just 24 hours. The excessive water caused multiple roads and bridges to collapse in the area. My normal routes for work have been washed away. There are still times where I forget or don't realize that a road is out and look to my right or left and see a mess of broken concrete and red dirt. We were lucky not to, but a lot of people in the area had severe flooding in there homes. Community outreach has been excellent, though, with multiple disaster relief efforts working to help out those in need.
We shut down the day after the flooding at work. I should have enjoyed myself but instead got worked up, as I did not receive a call saying we were closed, just one that we would open at noon. I was concerned I would be late for work and be in trouble. It was silly, really, but I didn't sleep well at all the night before because we were in a tornado warning. We don't have a basement here, and only two interior rooms without windows. I couldn't allow myself to fall asleep like the dogs and Chris had, because I was so afraid we might miss a warning. SO, combine confusion with stress with lack of sleep and what do you get? An anxiety attack while your husband is driving you over a bridge.
Chris has not dealt with me having an anxiety attack. To be honest, I haven't had a bad one in a really long time. Normally, I am able to nip it in the bud with my trusty Xanax. Of course, this time, that was at home. Anxiety is really just such a stupid thing. As I am sitting in the passenger seat, slumped over and desperately trying to get some air in my lungs, I'm sobbing without tears and in my head thinking, "What is wrong with you? Why are you freaking out? You need to stop." But it's like your body is throwing this awful tantrum and won't listen to rhyme or reason. I was just sitting there, praying that I could pull myself out of it. I felt like I was trapped and it was never going to end. Ten minutes later, I finally snapped out of it. I don't remember driving for those ten minutes. I can't decide if it's my mind or my body that is the traitor, sending the other into an overwhelming fit like that. I don't think that my anxiety is nearly as bad as others, but that doesn't mean that it isn't scary. You almost feel like you can't trust yourself because you don't know when you will sell yourself out again.
It ended up being an okay day. Chris took me to a bookstore to calm down and we ended up going home and hanging out. Honestly, after an anxiety attack you are so drained that you don't want to do anything anyway. I always feel like I'm just going through the motions after that, almost like an empty shell while you try to regain some sense of control.
They say dogs are good therapy, so I would agree that going home to be with three of them was probably the best thing I could do.
Work has been going pretty well. The real unfortunate thing about being a non-profit organization is that you are often over-worked and understaffed. Some days are much better than others, thanks to the help of "as needed" staff, but there were two long days last week. It isn't so much the visits that take long, it's THE CHARTING. Oh my goodness, the charting kept me up until two in the morning one of those nights. I spent the rest of the week trying to catch up on sleep. Yesterday I had three patents to admit and I had to close up my computer at midnight and just say I'd come back to it today. At a certain point you are charting for quantity, not quality, and that just doesn't help anyone.
Bart had intermediate training class this morning at Petsmart. We finished up Beginner classes just a few weeks ago and decided to start in intermediate right away instead of waiting. I would not have minded taking some time off because Bart stresses me out in class. He is the dog that barks whenever the other dogs get to move around and he doesn't, and he has anxiety about doors, and often embarrasses me. We are lucky to have the trainer that we have; she is great with him and takes extra time in class to improve his anxiety about other dogs and doors. He is a really fabulous and smart dog. It's just that all of the commotion is a little bit too much for him at times. Nalli would probably be the same way if she were in the classroom.
Bart has begun to take over as the "alpha" family dog. He and Nalli wrestle daily and he has started to hold his head over hers, meaning he is the dominant one. She doesn't seem to be too bothered by it. I"m sure they will have their rounds but for now, they are having fun and getting their exercise with each other. I am actually able to ride my bike and let them go with me one at a time, which is beneficial because my knee is still bothering me from an injury in January.
I began doing T25, a beachbody workout, a couple of weeks ago. I am seeing some results and am pleased with how little time it takes to do the program. I can fit it in before work with some chores and breakfast. It makes for a good start to my day.
My friend, Sarah, that lives across the street got to spend Monday with me, as her air conditioner went out and she has a little one at home. She ended up hanging out with me for most of the day. I got to rock Addelie to sleep and Sarah was very impressed with my skills. Addelie, Sarah, and her husband James ended up coming over and staying for dinner which was really the goal we have had for a few weeks, it just hadn't happened yet. We love spending time with their family and Sarah is one of my best friends in Florida.
We have been doing some really fun things in Florida. Aside from going to the beach every once in a while, we have themed parties with friends. Our friends threw a Kentucky Derby party complete with big hats and mint juleps. We allowed ourselves to bet and lose a couple of dollars to our friends that are about five months pregnant and probably will use it for something useful, whereas we would probably just use it for beer.
The other themed party we went to was a Cajun crawfish boil. I absolutely loved it. The people that threw that party were in Chris' class and they live in a house right off a little river. They boiled 75 pounds of crawfish, corn on the cob, potatoes, and Andouille sausage for us. It was a huge hit; lots of people came out. Chris and I have never had crawfish and we both absolutely loved it. I bet I ate 25 of those little buggers. Delicious. We were also lucky enough to be the people that walked across the dock before the people who fell into the water with the dock, clothed with phones in pockets. That was very unfortunate for them.
Another memorable evening was on a Friday after work, my friends set up a pizza and girls' night. We are all military spouses or in the military ourselves so we always have lots to compla--err--talk about. We met at Mellow Mushroom for some amazing pizza (mine had truffle oil and baby bella mushrooms), and then went to see the movie, "The Other Woman". The movie was really, really funny and pretty witty until the end. Unfortunately the comedy turned south and went after jokes more meant for boys. We truly enjoyed ourselves, though, and overall it was a really great movie. It was a great girls' night that kept me out much later than I normally am!
Chris has been brewing beer now for a couple of months. It gets easier, quicker, and more intricate every time. He does all the brewing so long as I clean and sanitize. My part doesn't take nearly as long but it is harder work. It seems fair. So far we have brewed a Double IPA, a Summer Citrus (tastes like a Hefeweisen), another IPA, and finally, a Watermelon Wheat. I am very excited for the last one as I tried a Watermelon Wheat made by 21st Amendment Brewery last year that was amazing and I could not find in stores after. I have high hopes for that one.
My cousin is getting married in just a few short weeks in Minnesota. I am bummed that Chris can't go home with me, but so excited because my best friend Andrea is going to meet us in Sioux Falls on our drive up there and be my date. I cannot wait to see her and my family, and spend some time in good ol' Nebraska.
It is very unfortunate, however, that the family is not getting along so well. I guess when we lost my Uncle Keith a few months ago I thought it would bring us together and remind us how important family is while we have it. Instead, cousins and brothers and sisters are arguing and I understand why, I just wish that it was easier for us to think about how much we will regret the time we lose with each other when we are fighting and it's things like that we will regret much more than our pride.I deal with it every day of my life; people who die way too soon or people who can't seem to let go because they have loose ends to tie up.
My old college roommate and really good friend called today to talk about a family friend that had just passed away of cancer.One of my biggest realizations about cancer since I started working for hospice is that cancer couldn't give less of a crap about who you are, where you came from, how much money you have (or don't), how many people you have around you that love you, or how good (or bad) of a person you are. Cancer just does not care. It's the most frustrating thing about this disease. It's been a very busy week for me at work with that diagnosis; many of the patients I admitted this week have cancer. It is so awful and painful and I will never understand why people take a turn for the worse when the weather gets nicer. I know that often times people cling on until a birthday or special holiday or family event, and I suppose it's the same way with good weather. They just want to feel it one more time, whether they know it or not. Either way, cancer is a horribly frustrating disease.
I took a short break there to give ALL THREE DOGS a bath in the backyard. They definitely needed it and it is such a nice day out. Ruby is not super happy with me, Nalli looks embarrassed, and Bart is wondering why it's over. I'm just thinking that my productivity for the day is probably over. Now all three smell like apricots. Mmmmm.
I would really love to finish painting furniture this weekend, though. I've been chalk painting everything in sight the past few weekends and I will have to create another post to show off exactly what I have done. So far, I have been incredibly happy with the way everything has turned out. I hope that I can continue that trend as I only have a couple of projects left. I am still in search of a decent dresser for the second bedroom to put blankets and sheets in, but that will come when I find something that I really like.
The other weekend project I would like to conquer is finding some sort of portable garden. We were really lucky in Virginia because our landlords had put in a raised garden that I planted a bunch of stuff in. It was really fun to watch it grow. Unfortunately, here we don't have that setup and if we were to really put time and effort into it, it would be short-lived anyway, assuming we move in a couple of months. I was bidding on an outdoor flower stand this past week but someone outbid me at the last second. I wasn't too pleased about that, but I suppose it was not meant to be. I am hoping to find a metal baker's rack type thing and just use pots for a garden in the future, that way it is more mobile. Again, though, what if we move in two months?
The next time we move we will have to get some sort of small U-haul. We will have the three dogs and since we have done this a couple of times now, we know what we will need for the first few weeks before our things get to the new place and get unpacked.
Listen to me, it's like I think I am a pro or something.
I think Chris subconsciously knew what he was doing this morning when we went to work, driving my car, with my purse and billfold inside it. He knows I like to do some shopping on my days off and was likely trying to prevent that. Sneaky.
Chris and I started watching Game of Thrones, finally, after nearly everyone else. We wanted to see what all the hype was about and I think we kept watching because we learned to hate certain characters and just wanted to watch them die. How terrible does that sound? It's the truth. I could do without all the killing of the innocent people and the horses, though. I get pretty disgusted at all that. It is, HBO, however.
Chris is also into House of Cards now, meanwhile, I am obsessed with Parenthood and cannot get enough of it. I usually dislike any sort of drama but this one has me hooked for sure!
My brothers and parents came down last month to visit us. Luckily, I was able to take off work and Chris a couple days as well so they weren't ever pent up at our house while we were both busy. We were able to take them to some museums, shopping, the beach, but the best thing of all was the food. We were in Destin when we stumbled upon a fresh seafood market and decided to buy a bunch of tuna and juicy shrimp and grill it all up that night. It was so, so good. I will definitely miss that when we move away-that availability of fresh, fresh seafood! Mom also helped me paint a ton of stuff while she was here and got me completely hooked on chalk painting. She helped me paint our old, drab, mismatched table and chairs into Annie Sloan's Old White and Olive. Gorgeous. It looks so unbelievably good.
So it makes sense now why I am always out to buy things to paint and make them beautiful. I like American Paint Company chalk paint as well, it's just different.
Blaise's birthday was the weekend after they left, so we had some apple pie here with him, along with pizza, and I gave him a wooden sign that had the lyrics from "You Are My Sunshine", because we used to sing hat all of the time when we were little. He seemed to really enjoy himself while he was here. He got to sit on the couch and watch movies while we all hung out around him. He seemed very happy and even gave an independent answer when Chris asked him what his favorite part of the trip was. He answered, "Planes" without anyone having to say it to him, and we assume he was talking about the air museum Chris took the family to on base.
Bart is getting protective of me. He hangs around Chris and I whenever he can but right now he is currently chasing bugs away from me. I can't complain. He is such a big baby. And his equilibrium is not great; sometimes when he is a little off kilter we nudge him and he falls over. It is quite funny to watch and I'm sure we aren't the only ones who keep dogs around purely for entertainment.
Chris just called and finished his second flight for the day. He asked if I would go see the "Godzilla" movie with him and in the spirit of togetherness, I will sit through it. That is not my type of movie nor cast, so we will see if I can keep up. Of course, there is always popcorn to keep my spirits up. Why else do we go to movies?
